Clarke tried to cool him down while he kept muttering her name under his breath. He mumbled something unintelligible before saying, “I can’t do any of this without her.”
This took Clarke by surprise. She had seen Bellamy at his most vulnerable, but even then, even when she admitted that she needed him, she never thought he truly felt the same. Now, when he was letting out his secrets, the part of him that he kept hidden, he was talking about her.
“You’re stronger than you know,” she replied quietly.
“I’m stronger because of her.”
For a moment, Clarke felt dirty, like she was eavesdropping on a conversation that wasn’t meant for her ears. And it was true; if Bellamy was fully aware, he wouldn’t be saying these things. He especially wouldn’t be saying them to Clarke. Bellamy had a wall put up, an illusion he didn’t want broken. He wanted people to think he was this cold-hearted, powerful man. He was a leader, a good one, but not the leader he so often pretended to be.
“I could love her, Octavia,” were the last words that left his lips before the sickness got worse. He coughed up blood, the crimson pooling on the hard floor of the concrete. Clarke turned him on his side and rubbed his back as he went unconscious…
She sat down on the floor next to Bellamy’s bed, his words reverberating in her mind. I could love her.Clarke thought about what it could mean. She debated on whether if it was even what he truly felt or just an effect of the illness.
Regardless, she decided she could love him, too.
-Our Little Secret